Update

so i last told you that i had an assignment in RYAP due yesterday i turned it in ontime and got 100% (i dont really remember howmuch it was worth) i didnt end up studying for my vocab test last night but i did today and it was good i got like a 90 (one question! i missed 1 question!) oh well. I actually didnt end up waking up at noon, well acutally i did but then i turned off my alarm clock and went back to bed. i woke up when Cathy called me telling me that she was in her car ready to pick me up =P. I ended up getting ready and then having my mom take me. I also studied my french flash cards today. it was very lovely. OH!!!!!! i listended to CTK's sermon from sunday (you recommended it) and i LOVED IT!!! right now i'm listening to the 'Deep' series cuz i'm all caught up in 'Cringe' and i also listened to 'legacy of love' which was just one random sermon by the youth pastor which i liked but it was targeted more towards adults because it was about how they should be showing teenagers that they care. i agreed with everything he had to say. I'm THINKING about going to a different church were i can be more involved in the youth stuff because Faith doesnt really have that much stuff and about 1% is Bible-based. They really do no out reach stuff, no teaching from scripture, no small groups, no Bible studies. Dont get me wrong, i love Faith to death it's just i feel like i could grow so much more in a church that has youth programs that are Bible-based and that focous on you growing and having a relationship with God. At Faith it's kinda like 'lets have a good time give you some food for thought we'll throw around God's name so we can call ourselves a church youthgroup, but when it comes to helping you grow in your relationship with God, you're on your own'. Which really that attitude helped me to know that my faith is my own and not just people telling me what to believe so it was good for that, but now that i've discovered that i need to be around like-minded people and Faith just doesnt offer that. so who knows, i've been thinking about switching churches for a while and i'm glad that i stuck it out because i need to learn that every time that somthing bad happens i cant just run away, but the point of church is to worship, grow, and have fellowship with other believers. I'd say about 1% of the kids in the youthgroup (including me) actually have a relationship with God outside of church. And that maybe one other person understands that Christianity is not a once a week thing but a lifestyle (not samuel because he understands that, but doesnt even bother going to youthgroup anymore). My problem is i have no idea where i would go to church. any suggestions besides Mars Hill or CTK? both are amazing, but unfortunantly im a minor and therefore custody of me must be given to someone else in order for me to ditch the parents or i could be emancipated, but the parents have to sign a release form and Todd wouldnt go for that because it would ruin his precious image. Forgive me, i am bitter.

hello world

so what's new with you? right now im trying to put off school some more though i did do some work... im just not really in the mood right now (when am i ever?). tomorrow i have to get up and be ready to leave by 2pm; i usually wake up at 1:30 or so, so not really enough time (it would be but i need to shower and my mother doesnt really like it when i shower at night when shes trying to sleep). well i probably should go over my vocabulary words (for english and french) but i really really dont want to or i could work on an assignment for ryap (reaching you academic potential, yeah its a class) that's due by 11:59pm or i could work on a Digital Photography assignment, which really has more to do with editing pictures than taking them. or i could work on math. it really stinks because there's this book Looking For Alaska by John Green that i really want but i have a fine on my library card for both libraries. =P so i cant check anything out at either of them and Tere was kinda mad at me today (not really sure why but honestly people arent that pleasant around here and yes sometimes i join them) so she wouldnt let me use her library card and i dont have any money to pay off my fines (it'll be over $20 for both probably) like seirously i have $4 so i told Terese that i wanted to be able to use my library cards for christmas. Other than that im not really sure what i want. what about you?
ok i've procrastinated enough.

shortest blog post ever. it explains all.

 

Story of my life.

ummm...... *scratches ear and laughs akwardly*

 

I thought i should post this lovely risque picture that you took last summer. I miss you Tina!!!!!!!!! and if anyone else is reading this because they stumbled across this blog here's what i have to say to you: You wish you had these legs. =)

what up?

so i just wanted you to know, in case you forgot or something. The most amazing person in the world is named Tina! And i miss her alot cuz unfortunantly i dont live anywhere near her! so yeah and i only get to see her once a year (i know its so unfair!) so yeah...

soooo....

I've noticed that most (meaning all but one) of my posts are depressing so i've decided to make this one not depressing! YAY!!!!! =) right now its 1:45am and i probably should be studying French but im not because im writing a blog post which is way better!!!! yeah... OH. MY. GOSH!!!!!! I HAVE AMAZING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!! IT RAINED TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and it was so beautiful and lovely and i couldnt believe how insane it is to go without it all year and then finally have it! and it rained for like a good 5hrs straight!!!!!! it was such a blissful experience!!!! By the way i need to give a happy birthday shout out to my BFFFFGCCIDDSSSDGCL and sister TINA!!!!! it was her birthday yesterday. SHE'S 14YRS OLD!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel so young. like seirously i have no friends. (who are my age. haha you thought i was going to say that i had no friends.) =) I love to google random things just to see what it will come up with. And if i dont know how to spell a word i will type it into google to see how it's supposed to be spelled. I heart Google!!! I hope this post wasnt depressing.

Today is not a lovely day. (btw this contains detail of my social life which isnt that big, read at your own risk)

As indicated by the title, today wasnt so awesome for me. I feel like i might burst into tears at any moment. And if i get into details as to why i probably wont so i'll spare you the details. I didnt sleep much Saturday night like at all. I was up until 3 or after cuz i couldnt sleep cuz i was thinking about Todd and all the junk that's there in our relationship. he talked to me today. it was awkward. So yeah, back to Saturday night; not fun. I woke up at 7 on sunday giving me a total of less than 4hrs of sleep that night. Then Sunday wasnt great because i was crying my eyes out which is cool with me an all to be broken, just not around other people that i kinda have some relationship with. Like its cool with me for me to start bawling my eyes out in the grocery store where i dont know anyone (i've been there) but for me to be around people who know me and who i respect its not cool (cool as in ok.) So yeah i was breaking down during the songs and as you know i sit with the wyncoops (Rachel was there so i sat next to her) and for the most part she didnt notice until the last song (she heard me sniff) and she gave me a hug which was nice. The thing is i have so much respect for them that i do but i dont want them to see me cry like crazy. Anyways they left after first service and miss Gloria wasnt there so i didnt have anyone to hang out with/bugg. So i hung out with a girl who is like a friendly aquantience and another girl of the same relation. Second service didnt stink but it wasnt the greatest. Im not a big fan of the youthgroup but according to Justin they're making some changes that i should like therefore he says i should go during the week too. It would be fine if i had friends but its sooo full of cliques its redicilous and i cant just go up to people and be like hey i like your shirt, how are you, ect, because believe me i've tried. and plus i've grown up with most of these people 50% of which were at one point my friends and then decided to ditch me because i wasnt cool enough for them, which is fine with me.
so today because of my lack of sleep yesterday, i went to bed at 12:30am last night and slept in until a little after 2pm because that's when Tere woke me up. then i watched Gilmore Girls and Chuck until going on Facebook and chatting with Rosie. then i went to boyscouts to pick up samuel, but i stayed in the car cuz i was in my PJ's (!viva la PJ's!) and then i came back to the parental authorities house and started some schoolwork.
my life is so interesting.